50 Ways to Say Goodbye

My heart is paralyzed

My head was oversized

I'll take the high road like I should

You said, "It's meant to be

That it's not you, it's me"

You're leaving now for my own good

That's cool, but if my friends ask where you are, I'm gonna say

She went down in an airplane

Fried getting suntanned

Fell in a cement mixer full of quicksand

Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes

She met a shark underwater

Fell and no one caught her

I returned everything I ever bought her

Help me, help me, I'm all out of lies

And ways to say you died

My pride still feels the sting

You were my everything

Someday I'll find a love like yours (a love like yours)

She'll think I'm Superman

Not super minivan

How could you leave on Yom Kippur?

That's cool, but if my friends ask where you are, I'm gonna say

She was caught in a mudslide

Eaten by a lion

Got run over by a crappy purple Scion

Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes

She dried up in the desert

Drowned in a hot tub

Danced to death at an east side nightclub

Help me, help me, I'm all out of lies

And ways to say you died

Ah-ah

Ah-ah

Oh-oh

I wanna live a thousand lives with you

I wanna be the one you're dying to love

But you don't want to

That's cool, but if my friends ask where you are, I'm gonna say

That's cool, but if my friends ask where you are, I'm gonna say

She went down in an airplane

Fried getting suntanned

Fell in a cement mixer full of quicksand

Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes

She met a shark underwater

Fell and no one caught her

I returned everything I ever bought her

Help me, help me, I'm all out of lies

She was caught in a mudslide

Eaten by a lion

Got run over by a crappy purple Scion

Help me, help me, I'm no good at goodbyes

She dried up in the desert

Drowned in a hot tub

Danced to death at an east side nightclub

Help me, help me, I'm all out of lies

And ways to say you died