Leave the Driving

Out on the old coast highway

Flying through the night

Jed got stopped by the CHP

For speedin' and no brake lights

Rolled down the driver's window

Slipped his gun down under the seat

The glove-box full of cocaine

The trunk was full of weed

"Driver's license and registration,"

Said the officer with his flashlight

Search around the floor, look hard

Smellin' like something ain't right

Jed's life flashed before him

Like a black and white super-8

He heard the sound of the future

On a scratchy old 78

Nothing was still, all was moving

When the flashlight found the gun

Then Jed pulled the trigger

In a split-second tragic blunder

"It makes you think about living

And what life has to tell"

Said Jed to Grandpa

From inside his cell

Camouflage hung in his closet

Guns all over the wall

Plans for buildings and engineers

And a book with no numbers at all

The whole town was stunned

They closed the coast highway for twelve hours

No one could get in

Jed was one of ours

Meanwhile across the ocean

Living in the internet

Is the cause of an explosion

No one has heard yet

But there's no need to worry

There's no reason to fuss

Just go on about your work now

And leave the drivin' to us

And we'll be watching you

No matter what you do

And you can do your part

By watching others too

Grandpa put down the paper

Staring in disbelief

Jed had always been good to him

Never gave him any grief

The moral of this story

Is try not to get too old

The more time you spend on earth

The more you see unfold

And as an afterthought

This must, too, be told

Some people have taken pure bullshit

And turned it into gold