Brush Up Your Shakespeare

The girls today in society go for classical poetry

So to win their hearts one must quote with ease

Aeschylus ans Euripides

One must know Homer, and believe me, eau

Sophocles, also Sappho-ho

Unless you know Shelley and Keats and Pope

Dainty Debbies will call you a dope

But the poet of them all

Who will start 'em simply ravin'

Is the poet people call

The Bard of Stratford on Avon

Brush up your Shakespeare

Start qouting him now

Brush up your Shakespeare

And the women you will wow

Just declaim a few lines from Othella

And they'll think you're a hell of a fella

If your blonde won't respond when you flatter 'er

Tell her what Tony told Cleopatterer

If she fights when her clothes you are mussing

What are clothes? Much ado about nussing

Brush up your Shakespeare

And they'll all kow-tow

Brush up your Shakespeare

Start quoting him now

Brush up your Shakespeare

And the women you will wow

With the wife of the British ambassida

Try a crack out of "Troilus and Cressida"

If she says she won't buy it or like it

Make her tike it, what's more As You Like It

If she says your behavior is heinous

Kick her right in the Coriolanus

Brush up your Shakespeare

And they'll all kow-tow

Brush up your Shakespeare

Start quoting him now

Brush up your Shakespeare

And the women you will wow

If you can't be a ham and do Hamlet

They will not give a damn or a damlet

Just recite an occasional sonnet

And your lap'll have honey upon it

When your baby is pleading for pleasure

Let her sample you Measure for Measure

Brush up your Shakespeare

And they'll all kow-tow - Forsooth

And they'll all kow-tow

And they'll all kow-tow

Brush up your Shakespeare

Start quoting him now

Brush up your Shakespeare

And the women you will wow

Better mention "The Merchant of Venice"

When her sweet pound o' flesh you would menace

In her virtue, at first, she defends---well

Just remind her that "All's Well Tat Ends Well"

And if still she won't give you a bonus

You know what Venus did to Adonis

Brush up your Shakespeare

And they'll all kow-tow - Thinkist thou?

And they'll all kow-tow - Odds bodkins

And they'll all kow-tow

Brush up your Shakespeare

Start quoting him now

Brush up your Shakepeare

And the women you will wow

If your girl is a Washington Heights dream

Treat the kid to "A Midsummer Night's Dream"

If she then wants an all-by-herself night

Let her rest ev'ry 'leventh or "Twelfth Night"

If because of your heat she gets huffy

Simply play on and "Lay on, Macduffy!"

Brush up your Shakespeare

And they'll always kow-tow - Forsooth

And they'll always kow-tow - Thinkist thou?

And they'll always kow-tow - We trou'

And they'll always kow-tow