Everything Happens To Me

I make a date for golf

And you can bet your life it rains

I try to give a party

And the guy upstairs complains

I guess I'll go through life

Just catching colds and missing trains

Everything happens to me

I never miss a thing

I've had the measles and the mumps

And every time I play an ace

My partner always trumps

I guess I'm just a fool

Who never looks before he jumps

Everything happens to me

At first, my heart thought you could break this jinx for me

That you could turn the trick to end despair

But I can't fool this foolish heart that thinks for me

So I've mortgaged all my castles in the air

I've telegraphed and phoned

And sent an air mail special too

Your answer was goodbye

And there was even postage due

I fell in love just once

And then it had to be with you

Everything happens to me