Fool Proof

The only ring I gave her came collect from county

She finally called it quits and said she's better off without me

And I'd be better off if I could stay out of this glass

But on this here stool, this here fool is swearin' she'll come back

She says I ain't got a shot, but I'm sittin' here with two

I can't stop falling off the top of good old Mountain Dew

They oughta make the bottle a little harder to get into

They don't make that liver killer, corn mash, brown liquor

Black label, loudmouth soup

Fool proof, mm, oh-yeah

It's like it sees me comin', and pours itself into

A man who's down to nothin', feelin' Johnny Walker Blue

It makes me dial her number when it makes me drink enough

And it wakes me up hungover, and makes her keep on hangin' up

Sayin' I ain't got a shot, but I'm sitting here with two

I can't stop falling off the top of good old Mountain Dew

They oughta make the bottle a little harder to get into

They don't make that liver killer, corn mash, brown liquor

Black label, loudmouth soup

Fool proof, mm

Mm

Fool me once, you'll fool me twice

Just fool me strong and over ice

'Cause I ain't got a shot, but I'm sitting here with two

I can't stop falling off the top of good old Mountain Dew

They oughta make the bottle a little harder to get into

They don't make that liver killer, corn mash, brown liquor

Black label, loudmouth soup

Fool proof

Fool proof