Sale Of The Century (Skit)

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls

Let's get ready for the Supreme Clientele Show

With your hilarious host, Dave Chappelle

Welcome to the show

What's question one, Dave?

What is the first thing a brother does when he wakes up in the hood in the morning?

Again, what is the first thing a brother does when he wakes up in the hood in the morning?

Ooh, ooh, yeah, yeah, I got it, got it

Alright, let's see if you got the answer

I'ma pray to the brown Jesus

Nigga, you lyin', you gon' eat that 1980s pussy

That is correct

Ayo, first thing I do in the morning, you know what I mean?

I scratch my balls, make sure it's two of 'em there

Then I thank my Lord and Savior that we still here

He is correct

I'ma light a Newport Hundred

Smack my bitch and have her make me some scrambled eggs

Correct

Don't put pork on my shit, bitch

I'ma put a porn on the VCR, beat my meat

So I can be light on my feet, you heard? Deadass

He is correct

I'ma keep it a buck with y'all

I just wake up, I'ma just go clean my gun

That is correct

I be in the bathroom with the Palmolive, cleanin' my hammer, so I don't

I don't, I don't, I don't know what these niggas is on

And he asked me, he ain't asked y'all